Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Coming Home

Oh Sister,

It's strange to think that it's already Thanksgiving.  It doesn't feel like I haven't been home in 4 months.  The time seems to drag and yet it feels like a week since I was last home.  The strangest thing will be to see everyone and see how they've aged, both young and old. 
Medical school is going well.  There's so much to learn but somehow it's not impossible to do.  Granted, I am never ahead or even caught up (I'm on page 54 as I type this and the class is on page 80, at 3 pages per hour I should be caught up by next semester) to what I am learning in class but I know what I need to when I need to. 
There's a necessary transition that takes place in becoming a doctor where you learn how to read a person in a way that other people can't.  I don't mean that in the sense that I can look at someone and know what is the matter at them, however there certainly are times that thoughts cross my mind, I mean that I can look at the language that doctors use and understand what they are talking about.  The underlying mechanisms of the body are becoming known to me and it's a very strange thing.  To look at a body and know what nerves are powering what muscles. To think about those nerves and know what neurotransmitters are driving the response.  To associate the correct drug to either agonize or antagonize the symptoms.  It's a strange thing.
The things that I have done in the past 4 months boggle my mind.  In the way that I will come home and see Abigail and be shocked at how big and how grown up she is, but to you the changes seem natural because you watched them gradually occur, I experience the same thing with what I have learned and can apply.  Sometimes I think that I haven't learned much until a concept comes up in class and I am able to associate what is being taught with a concept that came up months ago that I struggled with and yet now take for granted.  The changes were gradual but The Change is profound.

Over the past four months I've dissected a cadaver, learned the autonomic nervous system, learned cardiophysiology (I can put a stethoscope to someone's chest and actually have a clue what I'm hearing), learned to treat all sorts of interesting maladies, learned the biochemistry of lots of fun diseases, played doctor in a serious situation and had people confess their deepest secrets to me, I have grown up.

I am very excited to come home and see everyone.  I can't wait to just destress and spend time being around everyone who knows me.  I just wonder how I will apply those things that I have learned, how everyone will look to me. 

Love you both,


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